Posts Tagged ‘Family’

Hallmarks of an Adult?

November 16, 2016

Together, success is a given

The other morning I was listening to my local news station as I was catching up on my ‘words with friends’ and I was really surprised. I had only been listening half way, concentrating mostly on my strategy in the game I was playing on my phone, when something caught my attention. It was something about millennials taking classes in what the reporter called ‘adulting’. I didn’t know what that meant and still don’t really. The report went on talking about things adults do, for instance; chores around the house, budget their money, pay bills, file papers, and manage their time (although that’s a subject for another day).

The point of the report was that some millennials seem to be so lacking in knowledge in these areas that they feel a need to take classes.

Actually, I do get that because some of my clients are millennials and they haven’t the slightest idea how to go about cleaning their house, organizing their kitchen, putting away their clothes – I could go on but I think you get the idea. These millennials, the ones I work with (and possibly the ones in the news report), have grown up without any sense of what it takes to lead an organized life.

They have successfully completed school and, for the most part, have jobs. They want to live independently – to be adults.

Unfortunately, schools do not teach home/life skills otherwise known as home economics. I never took home economics in school – I think that was phased out even before my generation. So, what happened? Why is it that some of these young adults are not equipped with the basic skills and information that are the hallmarks of being an adult?

I think it’s a combination of things.

Some of these young people did not have the skills modeled for them. Maybe their parents weren’t great at organizing themselves, maybe they outsourced things like bill paying, maybe they didn’t ask the children to help with routine household chores.

Whatever the reason, I’m happy to know they are taking classes to fill in the blanks.

What are the hallmarks of becoming an adult?

For me, it’s taking care of myself and those in my family, taking care of my home (meaning keeping it clean and tidy), being a good friend, doing my job to the best of my ability, paying my bills, and having fun working on my hobbies which are gardening, needlepoint, and dancing.

What does being an adult mean to you?

PS I have written a book which covers all of these subject areas and more. You can learn more about my book on my website: www.dnqsolutions.com

 

 

 

 

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Rainy Day Family Activities

June 1, 2016

Here in Atlanta the children are out of school on summer vacation. We all want to spend lots of time outside enjoying the great outdoors but what do you do with your children when it’s pouring rain outside?

A certain amount of TV time or electronic game time is great. The children love playing with their devices.  I’m sure you don’t want them to spend the majority of their day in front of a screen!

Here are my top five suggestions:

1.      Do you have board games? Rainy days are a great time to pull them out.  Board games have a terrific educational component to them that is sometimes overlooked. The children engage in counting, reading, and taking turns. All wonderful skills!

young kids happy childrens family preparing funny cookies in kitchen at home

 2.      Do you like to bake? If you do that can be a really fun way to spend a few hours on a rainy day. The children can read the recipe, measure the ingredients, mix the batter and set the timer. These are also great educational skills to reinforce while they are away from the classroom. Of course, it’s really rewarding to have yummy treats to enjoy!

Mother with daughter reading book

 3.      Read a chapter book. Create a comfy spot with extra blankets and pillows. If your children are good readers you can take turns reading with your children. This helps to engage their mind and promotes creativity! Ask the children to draw a picture of their favorite character in the story.

Boy Coloring Pictures While Family Looking At It On Floor

 4.      Coloring – bring out the coloring books for adults and for children. You can have a selection of markers, colored pencils, and crayons available. Remember to talk while you’re coloring.

Full-length rear view of mother watching daughters trying on clothes in room

5.      Closets, Cupboards & drawers – Pick one. Have your children look at all their clothes in that one spot. Take all the clothes out of the designated area.  Ask them to try on any clothes that they are not sure if they fit. Put those in a donate bag. Put any clothes that your child say he won’t wear in the donate bag too. If there are clothes that need repair put them in a ‘to be mended’ bag. Tackle another area on the next rainy day. This way clothes don’t linger in your child’s room beyond their useful life and they are benefitting another child.

 I’d love to know about your favorite rainy day activity.

 

 

Mom

May 4, 2016

2015 05 beautiful roses

In honor of mother’s day I wanted to share some thoughts with you about my mother; my mom.

This is what I called my mother. She was always simply Mom. She was the best. Sadly, she left this life way too early at the young age of 73. She had Leukemia. She fought a valiant battle for about 14 months and never once complained.

This post is not about her passing but about her living. I am who I am in part because of some of the wonderful lessons my mom taught me. I want to tell you about her and about what I learned from my mom.

Mom loved her family wholeheartedly. I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters making us a large family. Mom loved us all unreservedly. We have our faults which she acknowledged and loved us anyway. She guided us when she thought we had lost our way, boosted us up when we were down in the dumps, and celebrated our accomplishments.

Mom loved to play tennis and croquet. She was a master gardener and flower arranger. I think some of that rubbed off on me. I love my garden and tend it faithfully. She and I used to go on garden tours whenever it was convenient. In fact, my mother’s day present to her was usually tickets to the local garden tour and a lovely lunch along the way! I loved the way she could identify and tell me about most of the plants we saw. She also loved to play poker! Mom had poker parties with two other couples. They had dinner and played poker long into the night – lots of fun!

Mom had great style. She was not particularly fashionable in what she wore. Rather she wore classic clothes and created her own style which suited her to perfection.

Mom was very opinionated. You never had to wonder what she was thinking. She would tell you if she liked or didn’t like something or what you were doing. She was very polite about it and had a way of letting you know where she stood about something without directly insulting you.

Mom loved to travel and experience new things. She was always up for an adventure. She came and visited me in Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Singapore when I lived in those cities. She was amazing.

I learned so much from my mom. She was a great role model. I learned to love adventures and to keep my mind open to different ways of thinking from my mom. Most of all I learned to celebrate all that this life has to offer, to see the good in situations, to look beyond the obvious and to be true to myself.

I miss mom more than words can say but I believe that she lives in my heart.

This mother’s day I will celebrate the memory of my mom and the wonderful times we had together with my brothers and sisters!

Tell me about your mother and your plans for Mother’s Day.

Now What? What do you do to take care of yourself?

November 4, 2015

Close-up of female hands holding teacup in front of opened book

Did you have a good and fun Halloween? I hope so! When my children were young we had the best time on Halloween. A friend of mine invited us all – my family and 3 other families – to come to their home, have dinner, and then go trick-or-treating. It was a blast! The children dressed up and went as a group knocking on doors, shouting “TRICK-OR-TREAT”, collecting candy and going on to the next door. We moms loved watching our young ones, making sure they all stayed together and took care of each other, and sharing our thoughts as we went walking down the sidewalk behind our children. We did this for many years. I have great memories of those times with my friends.

This Halloween tradition signaled the beginning of the Holiday season for me. Starting in November my calendar would always begin to get a little more jammed up with parties and responsibilities. I would begin to plan how I was going to get all the baking, shopping, decorating, and wrapping done well in advance of Christmas.

As the years went on I began to realize that I was taking care of everyone else and forgetting about myself. I started to plan little things just for me into my calendar. Are you wondering what sorts of things I plan for myself? They are little things: a half hour of peace and quiet reading a book, taking a bath, or doing some needlepoint. These are things I like to do that don’t cost anything, that help me relax, and that give me a feeling of well-being.

Think about it. What can you do to relieve the stress of the season? What sorts of activities let you relax, feel happy and centered?

Scheduling a few little things just for me is a wonderful way to make sure that I am able to take care of all that I have on my plate as well as myself during this very busy time of year. After all, I realize that I am much better at taking care of my family when I have taken time to take care of myself.

I’d love to know if you feel the same way and what you can do to take care of yourself!

Now What? Backwards Planning

October 7, 2015
Many Hands Holding the Word Events, Isolated

Many Hands Holding the Word Events, Isolated

Backwards planning? Why plan backwards? Why not just plan ahead? Well, backwards planning is really planning ahead – it’s called backwards planning because you start with the end result in mind. More details to come.

I have four siblings, many nieces and nephews, and two sons (one is married). This time of year brings lots of birthdays mixed in with all the holidays. Every time I look at the calendar I’m noticing that one of these relatives has a birthday coming up. So, I use backwards planning to stay on top of all these events.

First, I plot all the birthdays into my calendar. I love my phone for this because it automatically shows the birthday in the calendar function and I only enter them once. I admit, though, that I am very much a paper and pencil person. At the beginning of every year I get out my paper calendar and write in all the birthdays and then I count backwards and note in my calendar when I need to mail the birthday card. I also make a note a few days before the mailing date that I have to go and purchase a card! That is backwards planning!

At this time of year with the holidays approaching (I saw on Instagram yesterday that someone had counted the number of weekends left before Christmas!) backwards planning is a handy strategy to employ. You can use it to help in planning a party, with decorating for the holiday, meal planning or any big project you may have.

Here are the steps to take when using backwards planning:

Tools: paper, pen or pencil, a calendar

Steps:

  1. Start with an end date in mind
  2. On a piece of paper, list all the steps to take in order to complete your task
  3. Plot each step into your calendar – schedule enough time to complete each small step

The beauty of using this strategy is that backwards planning allows you to get things done in a timely fashion so that you’re not over scheduled and can actually enjoy the process.

Tell me, how will you use backwards planning as we approach this busy time of the year?

Now What? Are you Prepared for Disaster?

September 2, 2015
Natural disasters design concept set with hurricane and flood sketch isolated vector illustration

Natural disasters design concept set with hurricane and flood sketch isolated vector illustration

September is National Disaster Preparedness month. We often talk about being prepared. In fact, our children have fire drills at school. There are so many things we can do to help ourselves and our families be prepared if and when a disaster should strike. But, how many of us actually follow through and create plans which we then share with the other members of our family?

Let’s think about some possible scenarios and then look at the things anyone can do to be more prepared.

Sometimes we have warnings that a natural disaster could hit our area. Think about fire warnings, hurricane and flood warnings. However; there is often very little time between the time a tornado warning is issued and the tornado strikes. So, what should we do?

We can stock our homes with some basic survival supplies like flashlights, a battery operated radio and batteries for the flashlight as well as the radio, canned goods (keep in mind that canned goods do have an expiration date – so use them before they expire and then replace them!) bottled water, granola bars, extra blankets, hand sanitizer. You can make a list that is appropriate for your family and area of the country. Please don’t forget current medications! Have a place in your home where you keep these items and can easily put them together should the need arise.

Have an evacuation plan and practice it. Teach your children what to do, how they can get out of the house if there should be a house fire or flood.

Which room is the best room or area of the house to stay in if a hurricane or tornado is predicted? Is there enough room for everyone or do you need to find a couple of safe places?

If you’re looking for a good book with excellent suggestions and strategies of how to prepare for a disaster check out Judith Kolberg’s book: Organize for Disaster

Another way to prepare ourselves is to have a complete home inventory. Why do you want this? Well, if your home is damaged or destroyed as a result of one of these natural disasters you will need proof of what the house contained. You will also need access to account numbers and insurance policy information.

The best way to keep this information is in the cloud. That way you can access the information from any computer at any time. The program I highly recommend is HomeZada (www.homezada.com). This program allows you store your inventory complete with pictures and other useful information that will help you with the upkeep and maintenance of your home. Check it out!

I hope you find these tips useful and will implement some of them!