Posts Tagged ‘Life’

Face It! Life is Messy!

February 8, 2017

Recently I read the book titled: MESSY: The Power of Disorder to Transform Our Lives by Tim Harford. This book has really opened my eyes to all the ways in which the best intentions for tidiness and order can sometimes have a negative impact. My plan is to look at several sections of the book that directly relate to what I do as a professional organizer over the next few weeks.

I know, first hand, that life is messy. Things do not always happen as planned. I’m a huge fan of planning but quite often the best laid plans simply need to be put aside to let whatever happen. I started my work life as a preschool/primary school teacher. Teachers create lesson plans but many times the lesson can morph away from the planned lesson into something very different but equally beneficial – a unique learning experience. Something you could never have planned for but which just sort of organically happened. Sometimes it’s a wonderful thing and sometimes it’s a hard lesson to learn – not so wonderful. The trick is to let the lesson happen and not to insist that the planned lesson take place. That has been the hardest lesson for me to learn. I usually wanted to bring the discussion back to its original intention. As the years went on and as I gained experience in the classroom I learned to be more flexible, to go with the flow, and to let the alternative lesson happen.

The book, MESSY, addresses this topic in the opening chapter. The author teaches the reader that some of the best performances have happened when the planned circumstances did not come together as the planner had intended. No, I’m not going to give you any specifics – you’ll have to read the book.

What do you do when life gets in the way, when it’s messy and your plan is foiled?

My son and daughter-in-law had planned for their wedding ceremony to be on a lawn over- looking the water. It was a picture – perfect location. The white chairs were set out on the lawn. There was a tent which was beautifully decorated for the dinner and dancing to follow the ceremony. The morning dawned with some wispy clouds. We thought nothing of it. The hairdresser came to give all us women in the bridal party gorgeous hairdos. I noticed it got a little overcast but didn’t pay too much attention. We were having too much fun getting ready for this wedding to happen.

Wouldn’t you know, it started pouring cats and dogs (as the expression goes) about an hour before the ceremony. Our guests were arriving and went straight into the tent. They couldn’t hang out on the lawn as planned.

We didn’t know quite what to do as there really wasn’t room on the dance floor under the tent to set out rows of chairs.

The Rabbi and the Priest suggested that the wedding ceremony take place on the dance floor with the wedding party in a semi-circle. Our guests could gather around. Those who needed to sit could sit at a table.

The rain stopped just as it was time to begin the ceremony. We stuck with our new plan because we thought the rain might start up again.

It was a beautiful ceremony. Made even more intimate because the guests gathered around, forming this almost magical circle around the wedding party.

We never would have felt that closeness out on the lawn with the guests seated in rows of chairs. It would have been lovely but what actually happened was even better.

Yes, it was a little messy and we, the two moms, were a little frantic at first but we let it be and it was better than anything we had planned.

Are you a planner? Do you have trouble going with the flow? Connect with me for support.

 

 

Mom

May 4, 2016

2015 05 beautiful roses

In honor of mother’s day I wanted to share some thoughts with you about my mother; my mom.

This is what I called my mother. She was always simply Mom. She was the best. Sadly, she left this life way too early at the young age of 73. She had Leukemia. She fought a valiant battle for about 14 months and never once complained.

This post is not about her passing but about her living. I am who I am in part because of some of the wonderful lessons my mom taught me. I want to tell you about her and about what I learned from my mom.

Mom loved her family wholeheartedly. I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters making us a large family. Mom loved us all unreservedly. We have our faults which she acknowledged and loved us anyway. She guided us when she thought we had lost our way, boosted us up when we were down in the dumps, and celebrated our accomplishments.

Mom loved to play tennis and croquet. She was a master gardener and flower arranger. I think some of that rubbed off on me. I love my garden and tend it faithfully. She and I used to go on garden tours whenever it was convenient. In fact, my mother’s day present to her was usually tickets to the local garden tour and a lovely lunch along the way! I loved the way she could identify and tell me about most of the plants we saw. She also loved to play poker! Mom had poker parties with two other couples. They had dinner and played poker long into the night – lots of fun!

Mom had great style. She was not particularly fashionable in what she wore. Rather she wore classic clothes and created her own style which suited her to perfection.

Mom was very opinionated. You never had to wonder what she was thinking. She would tell you if she liked or didn’t like something or what you were doing. She was very polite about it and had a way of letting you know where she stood about something without directly insulting you.

Mom loved to travel and experience new things. She was always up for an adventure. She came and visited me in Bangkok, Hong Kong, and Singapore when I lived in those cities. She was amazing.

I learned so much from my mom. She was a great role model. I learned to love adventures and to keep my mind open to different ways of thinking from my mom. Most of all I learned to celebrate all that this life has to offer, to see the good in situations, to look beyond the obvious and to be true to myself.

I miss mom more than words can say but I believe that she lives in my heart.

This mother’s day I will celebrate the memory of my mom and the wonderful times we had together with my brothers and sisters!

Tell me about your mother and your plans for Mother’s Day.